What Lies Ahead

 

Can someone please tell me what lies ahead in the next month or two?  Will the Delta variant derail my plans?  Will I be able to sell the apartments and move to Vancouver to start a new life?  Will BB cooperate and be willing to work together with me on the move?  I have a million questions but no answers for any of them...

What is in my future?  

I know I am happy about visiting New York again but how long will this period of enchantment last?  Will I ever be happy again?

Living one day at a time is hard.  Sometimes I think if my life is cut short like Wai's, would I be upset?  I know I have no regrets about this life.  I have had my share of ups and downs but I am glad I found the greatest joy in my work.

Sad Day

 

This is such a sad day.  To lose Wai so soon.  We've been friends for so long and I always thought I can count on us being there for each other.  I should be grateful to her since her friendship has been a sense of homecoming for me when I am back in Vancouver.  I don't feel the burden of having a faith (as in religion) when I am with her.  

I never thought she would leave so soon. It's heartbreaking to see her mother sob at the funeral.  It must be so hard to lose your eldest daughter...

I truly blame the pandemic for not being able to spend more time with her during her lifetime.  You are truly free now, Wai.  You no longer have to deal with your diabetes and your spirit will soar to new heights.  

Meanwhile, I feel my future is so fluid.  I don't know and can't see what's in front of me anymore.  I can only handle life one day at a time.  Sometimes I worry about the days that I still have left on this earth.  Maybe next time this year I will be gone and vanish into the abyss.